Thrills, Chills and Spills

Detoxed from coffee the last month and just finished an iced Americano. I'm zooming, but totally unproductively because I haven't slept in a week! I'm having one of my insomniatic/manic episodes and I'm feeling crazy and uncoordinated. I spilled Brothers hot chocolate all over his jacket because I was just not present in my body.

Session two last night of the RC fundamentals workshop and I am feeling raw. I want to quit. This process of releasing old hurts and feelings so that I can experience the present as ... well.... the present without all of the baggage...ugh. It's so complicated to explain.

I'm thankful that I have my friend KdD to help me continue attending. An accountability buddy.

and in other news....
one of my best girlfriends is pregnant and has been looking forward to this phase of life with a family for a long time. We shared a wonderful conversation a couple of weeks ago, about what her expectations and desires were for her birth. I was wondering what kind of experience she wanted to have for herself. She was at my home birth and I know how important this next phase is to her. I truly want for her to have a powerful and beautiful transition into family life. It was a lovely conversation and she opened up about some questions and concerns and is now actively exploring her options and choices. I am so proud of her bravery to get out there and ask questions. She is really taking control of her pregnancy and her experience.

She and her Dearest are meeting with the midwife tonight. I'm excited about the possibility that she may be having a birth attended by the same midwife that was there for the birth of my second. This is special to me since I am so far away physically. I wish I could be there with her through the process. But am glad to have been able to help her get started in her information gathering. It's only been two weeks and she called me with an amazing report. People with the information that she needs are just popping up everywhere she goes right now! I have thrill bumps all over my elbows and chest just thinking about it. It's that exciting to me to see my friends living.