The Talking Stick

Today will be a day of cleaning the house and preparing for the weekend.

I completed the talking stick last night. Showed it to Sister Bean this morning and she had no comment but the look on her face was, "You wrapped yarn around a stick. So big deal." It was a big deal to me. The time spent meditating with the sage smudging and the candles glowing was refreshing. Feeling my fingers tie knots, feeling the different textures of yarn and enjoying the colors with my eyes; being in the moment without time restrictions was liberating.

This stick has been an all important B story in the story of my days for the past month. First, I had to find just the right stick. I auditioned quite a few whilst cleaning and raking the yard. Then Eric and I had a major fight because he cut the stick and threw out half of it. The inhumanity of it! He obviously didn't listen to me while I was sharing my thoughts and ideas about the stick the day before.

This is our main fight. As liberated as he thinks he is. He is a chauvinist pig. Loves to throw the guilt and shame my way while saying, "I support you and your creativity." His disregard of the stick was a symbol of his disregard for me. How can I use this stick now? I'm thinking. I was distraught. We had a big fight. Then a discussion and maybe have come closer to some understanding. At least he knows that I am not going to be disregarded. I decided to fish the other half of the stick out of the green waste bin and did much meditation about cleansing, honoring and redefining the stick into a ceremonial "Talking Stick."

This stick episode has become a symbolic story of my transformation.

The RC workshops and counseling have truly been the best tool for re-emerging that I have found. Now as I try to finish up my leadership training, I have to be sensitive to those that are behind me on the path. Humility instead of the infamous, "chip on the shoulder."

...sigh....maybe more later.